So last week I had an injury around my eye which basically meant that I looked like I had been attacked by a grizzly bear (no word of a lie). Now whilst I definitely wouldn’t describe myself as someone who is generally self-conscious I can definitely admit that this had an effect on my confidence. I found myself avoiding conversations with people and even avoiding leaving my room. Ultimately, it meant that I had a pretty boring week and avoided the things that I enjoyed doing most. However, at the end of the week, I came to a few key realisations. The first thing was that when I did have to see people, almost all of them did not notice anything different about me. And even in the ones who I did tell that I had an injury, the most common response was “I honestly didn’t even notice at Kenji, but anyways, back to our conversation…”. It then dawned on me that this entire week I felt like I had a spotlight on my head and that everyone could see it. What I realised was that everyone is self-conscious for their own reasons and are focused on their own problems. In the nicest way possible, people don’t actually care as much as we think they do. And even if people do notice that something is not quite right, the people we spend our time with (and therefore care about their opinions) are genuine people that are there to support us rather than harm us. And when I had this realisation it was so freeing. Even though I hadn’t been fully healed yet, I went back to my daily routine which involved meeting up with my friends and going to the gym. And when people did eventually notice a difference, I briefly explained what happened and the conversation continued as it normally would. So I’m hoping that the next time I have an injury or something similar happens that affects my confidence, I’ll continue to be me and be happy in my own skin no matter what it looks like.
I hope this gives you something to think about and I would love to hear your opinion on this. Please reply to this email with any thoughts that you might have. Enjoy your week and I’ll catch you guys on the next one! :)
👍🏾 Things I’ve enjoyed this week
• Red Notice (movie on Netflix) - this is a comedy that my girlfriend and I watched recently with Dwayne Johnson. Highly recommend for a Friday night.
•King Richard (movie) - one of my favourite films this year hands down. This tells the inspiring story of how Venus and Serena Williams were coached and brought up by their father to become the best tennis players in the world starring Will Smith.
•Will (book) - Will Smith is one of my favourite actors and I started listening to his audiobook where he talks about his life and upbringing. It’s incredibly inspiring and definitely worth a listen!
🙇🏽♂️ What I’m working on
I just put up a 35% off Black Friday deal for everything on my website and also my medicine online interview course using the code “BLACKFRIDAY” for the next 24 hours only. Check them out if you need anything :)
📚 Highlight of the week
The Almanack of Naval Ravikant by Eric Jorgenson
One day, I realized with all these people I was jealous of, I couldn’t just choose little aspects of their life. I couldn’t say I want his body, I want her money, I want his personality. You have to be that person. Do you want to actually be that person with all of their reactions, their desires, their family, their happiness level, their outlook on life, their self-image? If you’re not willing to do a wholesale, 24/7, 100 percent swap with who that person is, then there is no point in being jealous. Once I came to that realization, jealousy faded away because I don’t want to be anybody else. I’m perfectly happy being me. By the way, even that is under my control. To be happy being me. It’s just there are no social rewards for it.
The Mastery of Love by Don Miguel Ruiz
You have the power to create. Your power is so strong that whatever you believe comes true. You create yourself, whatever you believe you are. You are the way you are because that is what you believe about yourself. Your whole reality, everything you believe, is your creation. You have the same power as any other human in the world. The main difference between you and someone else is how you apply your power, what you create with your power. You may be similar to others in many ways, but no one in the whole world lives her life the way you do.